The new cure

He's not retarded, he's just a fucking idiot.

I may have a bit of a sick mind, but only when it comes to things I would find hil-fucking-arious. For example:

At the club we have a lot of regulars. One in particular is one who is referred to as "Special Ed". He's the idiot. He's not retarded, just a fucking idiot. Too stupid to work but just stupid enough to collect money from the government.

Anyways Sp. Ed come to the door where me and another guy are working and announces that he has hemorrhoids and 3 pairs of blood underwear at home. (You didn't want to know that?? Well neither did I!!) I tell him that he's probably just on his period and congratulated him for finally becoming a women.

As started walking away I turn and announce: "Hey, you know what will cure your hemorrhoids? Just rub some IcyHot on the area, you'll be fine." I could barely get it out I started laughing so hard.

The other guy at the door kept the joke going by telling everyone else there that knew him to try and convince him to IcyHot his hemorrhoids away.

ouch...