Consumerism blows

I just finished my sociology class and as usual, it depressed the fuck out of me. It was about consumerism and all that shit. It totally made me feel like a bastard because I spend money.

Now, im no where near the extreme they were talking about, but I guess im still a part of it. I don't by things on credit, I don't have a credit card. I could, I just don't. Iv been working nearly full time for the past 3.5 years and iv saved nearly half of everything iv ever made. I have saved enough to pay for my college for the next two years at least, I probably wont need to take out any loans to pay for my schooling.

My parents don't pay for my school, its all on me. They have been nice enough to let me live at home for these first couple years while I go to school near home, so that has helped out a lot. But paying for school is still up to me.

I do have my own car (not fancy), I have a computer (bought it used and cheap), I have bought shit that in retrospect I could live with out (iPod and DVDs).

I don't wear expensive clothes, my shirts don't say "nike" "AE" "Hollister" or any of that other bullshit that I see around school. I don't go out and buy the "in shit" and I could care less how I look to other people while at the same time I try to look respectable (im not a total bum). My shoes are a bit worn and faded (mostly because of that night I had to run though corn fields to get away from cops that busted up a party I was at months ago) but I don't NEED new ones.

and yet, I feel like a total fucking bastard for having money, money that I used for my education. Im in no way rich, iv just worked a lot more than me peers. When other kids in high school were in sports and extra-curricular activities I was at work. If anyone has ever wondered why I have little social life and few friends, that's why.

oh well, this is just how im feeling right now... My this time tomorrow the feeling will like to have faded away. I guess that's the problem, it shouldn't fade?